FUFU

I suppose the F U  will be officially over tomorrow when Limpy and her family go home.  It was sure a wonderful week-end.  I want to thank everyone for coming .  We had such a good time.  We had so much fun. ( sorry, Karo). 

 

We  rode the four wheeler and the go-cart.  Well, everyone else rode them.  I cannot  climb upon them with my leg and hip yet.  Maybe I can before the riding weather is gone. 

 

Had lots of food, and we all ate until we made pigs of  ourselves.  But, it was so good.  All the ladies worked hard and helped fix the food.  I hated to see everyone go home.  I love you all, and hope tpo see all of you at the next F U.  There were 24 here, I think.  Mary and Cecil ( Marion’s sis and Bro in law.) came also.  We had rain a coupla times at night.  Some were going to sleep out on the screened porch the first night, but, it rained very hard that night, and the whole porch got wet because the wind blew in rain in.

 

Guess I’d better close and go to bed.  It is midnight and Limpy and them have to get up early.  Me, too.  This evening Limpy and I and Robbie sang to the kareoke.  That was fun.  After that, Robbie and I played the guitars .  They said I play good, but, I do not agree.

 

Ya’ll take care.  Love ya. G’night.

Love, Bets

nothing special

Hi, guys.  How are all  of ya’ll?  We are just fine.  We are still having lots of ice and snow on the ground.  We have had snow and ice on the ground since the 12th of Jan.  We are tired of  it.  It is very dangerous to walk outside now.  Lot’s of people her have fallen and broken bones.

 Our pup dog is soooo cute.  She will be four months old on the 8th of Feb. 

she is so funny to watch. 

Jer…I ordered a machine that transfers cassette tapes and phonograph record onto cd’s.  It looks like an old phonograph player, and it has internal speakers, and jacks for external speakers.  It says in the literature  that it does these things in  ”three easy steps”  but, they don’t know me, do they?

It was expensive, ($400)  but, it will be used a lot.  I have lots of cassette tapes that me and friends and family have made, and lots that I have made alone.  I do not have a cassette  tape player in my car, so this way I can listen to cd’s  while  I  drive.  As ya’ll know, cassettes are on their way out.

Anyway, I guess that is all I have to say right now.  You all behave,

Anyway,

Bad Times

I read the stories about Walt and Ed and how they liked to beat up on Jay. Well, I don’t know what was in their minds, or if they were vexed or had demons in their minds.  They told Ed that because he drew those horrible looking  figures and monsters and devils that he was a devil himself.  I do know that when Ed was a teenager, Daddy used to make him watch while he had sex with Mother.  I guess that was Daddy’s way, as sick as it was, of teaching Ed “the facts of life..” That must have been horrific and demoralizing for Ed.  Mother was always drunk, or she would not have stood for it. 

  Ed never did anything mean to me, that I can remember, except that I bought my first car when I was 18, and it was a 1951 Ford, and I went to the house in Kansas City and bought it , and paid my hard earned $80.00 for it.  It did not make it back  to our house.  It broke down.  Mother had it towed to our house, and parked it.  I  had  filled the gas tank on the way home.  Well, before long Ed had syphoned the gas, and taken all  four of my tires off and used them on  his car.  Mother let him. I never drove that car again.  Other than that, he practically ignored me most of the time.

  Now , Walton, was not so nice to me.  When  we lived in Henderson and I was from the age of six to nine, Walton sexually abused me everytime Mother and Daddy went somewhere.  One aprticalar time he laid me up on a table so I was be higher to him and made me perform oral sex on him.  I cried.   He always made Ed and Jay go outside.   I was so deathly afraid of him that I was afraid not to do what he said.  He laid a whip on the floor and told me that he would use it if I did not.   One time after one of the “sessions”  he said, ” If you tell Dady and Mother, I will kill you.  You will be just as dead as if  a car ran over you on the highway”  I will never forget those words.  That is exactly what he said.  I stayed away from Walton as much as I could, yet as God as my witness I loved him and I would have done anything for him.  I wanted him to just plain ol’ talk and joke with me like  he was to the rest of you guys, and I always figured it was because he felt guilty and did not know what to do about it.  I always felt like our family kids and all, after Walton was grown, kinda held him on a  pedistal.

I don’t hate Walton, and I don’t hate Ed.  I now know that  they  had a lot of turmoil going on in  their minds.  Daddy was mean to us, we have to admit that, but, I do believe that he was trying to do what he thought would make good people out of us.  I had a baby kitten there on 88th place, and Daddy told me to give it away or he would kill it.  It took me two days to find a girl who wanted it.  I came home to get it, and it was laying in the yard dead. 

I know you guys probably always thought I was a church fanatic, but, from the time was old enough to get out of the house by myself, I found that church and the good feeling I got there was the only thing that helped  me keep my sanity.  When Mother went ot work nights,  my father also sexually abused me.  From the time I was ten until I  was old enough to get babies.  I used to wonder if all daddies did that. 

I don’t hate Daddy.  I have spent many many prayers telling God that I did not want to hate anyone.  I don’t know what makes people do the things that they do, and I am sure there many kids who had it a lot worse that I did.  I used to tell Mother what Daddy was doing and she told me to shut up.

Don’t ask me what kept me from growing up twisted and nuts , or a druggie, or whatever.  It had to be God.  I’ll say one thing, my big brother Jay was my main help and comfort, and he did not even know it.  He was always there for me, and  I felt protected  when he was home.  He was  my buddy .  You are all my buddies, I love every one of you, but, Jay and I are only 13 months apart, and we  went through lots of “stuff” together that  the rest of you are not old enough to remember.   He would let me tag along with him when he went with his friends, just up to the store and stuff like that.  When we got home, he was the one Daddy yelled at for taking me “with those hoodlum friends of his”  and Jay would just look at me while Daddy was getting onto him like he was saying  to me with his expression, ”Just be quiet.” If one of those guys had put a finger on me, Jay would have taken him apart.  But, they were not hoodlums anyway. 

I had a lot of bad stuff happen to me, all of  kids did, but, God has blessed me in so many ways anyway, all my life.  He has given me three wonderful sons.  and a good vocation that I love, and good health, and now he has given  me Marion who is wondeful. 

I have not told anyone but Linda an Karo about my deals with Walt and Daddy.  I knew that they would understand, and not tell anyone before I was ready to tell it.

I hope I have not made anyone feel bad, or brought back any bad memories to anyone.  I guess it was just my turn to talk.  I am ready to listen to anthing anyone else has to tell.

love, Bets

ewwwwwweeee….!!!!!

Years and years ago, when we lived on 133rd in Hawthorne, I was laying on the couch  watching t-v, and I picked a big bugger out of my nose and wiped it on the couch and left it there.  A few minutes later, Mother walked thru the livingroom, and saw the spot on the couch,  ( the bugger ) and she reached down to pick it up, not knowing what it was.  She got it on her fingers, and looked at it, then gasped…” GAWD…!!”  and walked off.

I Dunno……

I Ihave not been online for several days because for some reason my computer , or someone or some thing removed my  username and my password from my internet server. 

Now I have it straightened out, and I signed on finding 773 e-mails which I cannot possibly read at one time.  I read the new ones, however, and then I checked the Boshidiots and read all of them. 

Marion and I both have been sick with some kind of bug.  Coughing, sneezing, headaches and sinus congestion and all that junk that I think Jer said he had also. 

I am a whole of of melanholy tonight.  I guess it may be the fact that we are supposed to get 6-18 inches of snow tonight into tomorrow,  and it is in the teens for temperture.  I am getting just about over my  sick spell.

I will wait for Lynda to send me the e-mail I ask her to that will tell me how to bulk  delete my  list of e-mail that would take so long to read.  It would take a long time to delete them one by one.  She has the same e-mail that o have.  I am sorry that  I am too stupid to figure it out myself and not have to ask her.  But, I never was known to be real smart.

Ya’ll take good care of your selves.

Love, Bets

My on the job goof

Back when I worked at the city hall in Kansas City, mo.  I was at my post at the cashier’s cage, my boss, we were told to adress as ” Sarge”  called me to his desk.  I had just popped a Milk Dud into my mouth.  I went into his office, and leaned on my arms on the front part of his desk.  He began to talk, and as I listened, I sucked on my dud, and, then, to mine, and Sarge’s dismay, I began to drip chocolate slobbers down onto his business calender that sat on the front of his desk.  It was opened to the current date, and had notes on it.  He looked at his chocolate spattered calendar page, then up to my face, then back to the calendar, then to me, etc.  then he laid his pencil down and said to me that it was not important at the time, I could return to my post.  I turned and began to walk back to the cashiers cage.  I wanted to look back at him and apologize, but, I was scared to.  I figured it was best to let it go.